mercredi, avril 28, 2004

i had a dog growing up.

he died two days ago.
our dog scruffy was put to sleep on monday afternoon.

14 years, and a month.

we would sit in front of the tv, and he'd come hop on the couch and watch cheesy shows with us. and he'd freak out whenever you grabbed any of his toys.

and he'd sit on granny's lap during her morning prayers. and he knew that on sundays, aunty pat would be coming over to hang out with him in the sitting room.

mardi, avril 27, 2004

everytime i'm drunk, i become retarded and start eating a whole lot of random crap.

now i'm feeling totally (totally!) and completely fucked.
this is a paper about undirected data mining AND it is pretty fucking cool.

the sun's going down in a bit and we'll try to get a pitcher of cordon bleu de pabst before it gets too dark.
hm. i forgot to throw franz ferdinand on my ipod.

lundi, avril 26, 2004

mo and i were discussing about how there are way too many cool things to do in life. therein lies the dilemma - what should we choose to be?

- captain of industry
- restauranteur
- record label owner
- music producer
- venture capitalist
- mixed media artist
- creative director at some fashion house
- photographer
- foreign affairs correspondent
- own a design consultancy
- science and technology policy
- professor
- be in a band
you know, i really need to figure this focus thing out. music seems to help me zone out and into working on things, but somehow i still jump from task to task without thinking, without finishing any one.

[ in the middle of ]
- reading about the NIH roadmap
- figuring out some business process modeling stuff
- browsing some ibm interview article
- browsing another article on our intranet
- looking for cardigans tickets online
- composing a message on mac webmail
- listening to modest mouse
- figuring out what the interns should/will work on this summer
- burning some franz ferdinand on a cd so i can play it on the stereo
- feeling mildly pissed off that my other stereo stopped working

YES - i do know that everyone else fucking feels like this too, BUT doesn't anyone find it the least bit annoying? HAAAALP! ack!

samedi, avril 24, 2004

astella loved this quote from leonard:

"I just can't deal with pathetic."

vendredi, avril 23, 2004

hm, so apparently i've got a gmail account now!

thirteen was taken but you can send me a note at elroar(at)!!!
kev, mo, jess and i just got back from a trip to The Other Side (cosmic cafe!). israel came over awhile later after cooking some soup that took 2 hours.

we went through several pitchers and i'm DRUNK!
isn't that AWESOME?

somewhere over in maryland i'm sure there's an insectgod that's proud of me!

mercredi, avril 21, 2004


I just got


done - and I feel AWEsome. Wow! Major sense of accomplishment creeping up and down my spine.

It takes me forever to get me focused on anything and yet there's this remarkable feeling whenever I get things done.

I really should do this more often.

samedi, avril 17, 2004

so my bud lonnie packed up and moved to houston today - tracy flew over for the road trip, and i hitched a ride down to hartford ct for eran's ballet performance.

some random pictures that tracy took.

jeudi, avril 15, 2004

i am not in a good state right now.

messed up. staring at the box of cloves across from me, really wanting a cigarette despite knowing that it's just going to fuck me over.

messed up.

make it stop.